Alright, I’m back to gripe once again. Sorry for the hiatus.
I don’t know if you have one of these sorts of movie theaters in your area but here in Los Angeles, there are a handful of theaters and theater chains (if you can call them that) which are trying to differentiate themselves with a few nice features:
1) Assigned seating (no more struggling to find a place for you and yours)
2) Stadium seating (no more fuzzy borders for your movie)
3) Bars and 21+ screenings (so you can enjoy that crappy movie your girlfriend wants to see because you’ll be drunk)
4) No late seating (so that jack-off who weighs 400lbs doesn’t drop popcorn all over you while smashing your feet as he tries to get to his seat).
That last one is the the reason we’re here today, class. Is it a good policy? Damned right it is. I’ve been in enough theaters where you’ve got to watch silhouettes of morons trying to find their seats 15 minutes into the movie.
Here’s the thing though: late seating isn’t a crime. It’s not nice and it can be annoying but it doesn’t always have to be. Here was my situation today:
1) Delayed by a last minute work thing.
2) Traffic for no apparent reason at 10:40 am. It’s usually find by now, especially on a Friday.
3) Finding a parking space.
4) Dealing with a disorganized and slow concessions stand–you’ve got to love it when they have 3-4 people behind the stand and just two customers, one of which is me, and it still take 5-10 minutes to get to me and get my order filled.
All told, I was 30 minutes late. Sure that sucked and was well beyond any time I’ve been late to a movie. But check it out:
1) It was a 10:45am showing on a weekday.
2) I’ve been to plenty of screenings on weekdays, though at more reasonable times (like 12 or 1pm). Even popular movies have no more than 20-30 people).
3) The theater seats upwards of 400 people and has stadium seating.
4) I was in an aisle seat…I’m ALWAYS in an aisle seat.
5) The theater has a back door.
6) I’m a paying customer at 10-fucking-45 AM. I’m like solid gold. You’re showing the movie whether the theater’s full or not.
This is the point where you as a supervising member of staff at the theater have to decide something. Is it better to have an irate/pissed off/disappointed customer under these circumstances or do you make an exception, collect your $34 dollars (with concessions after all), and find some way to accommodate a regular customer?
The Letter of the Law
Let’s put it another way. When it comes to laws (as in those that say you can’t kill someone or something like that), there’s this idea of the “spirit of the law“. It basically means adhering or enforcing a law based on what it was intended to do, rather than just following it to the letter. Hell, California’s even got one of these “fuzzy” laws to govern driving rules.
For instance, if you have a law that says something like “You can’t kill someone.” You look at that and understand what it means…you aren’t allowed to just kill someone. Nice, great law. Wait, what happens when that someone is a murderer who’s trying to kill you? The letter of the law says you can’t kill someone so guess what happens when you snuff out that murdered in self-defense? You’re getting a priest and a needle.
But, the spirit of the law would interpret it more like, “You can’t kill someone, unless they’re trying to kill you.” And, I think most people would agree, that is what you’d want to enforce.
I know, I know, extreme example. But it’s a simple one too. Just like customer service. I’m sure you’ve been the victim of some stupid (or maybe even good…most of the time) customer service policy at some company. Why? Because not every customer service department head or policy maker is a genius at customer service…and not all of them are guided by ensuring the customer’s well-being is top priority–they’ve got to make money too.
Customer Service
Still, you’ve seen both sides of the story I’m sure. For instance, if you’ve ever made a purchase from Zappos you’ve probably experienced some great customer service. Whether it’s them randomly upgrading a shipment to overnight free of charge or just dealing with their hassle-free (and, well, free) returns policy, they do a great job of customer service because they think about the customer first. They aren’t giving away the farm but their policies are designed to keep the customer happy since happy customers mean return customers and more revenue.
Meanwhile, you’ve got other companies that will charge you restocking fees, return shipment costs, and make life as hard as possible for you to return items and otherwise deal with the “abnormal” aspects of commerce. In fact, a lot of companies seem to hide behind their policies, whether it’s a returns policy or some other policy that is meant to protect the company in some way.
What’s the point?
Which brings us back to this issue. The theater in question? Arclight Theaters. Will I go back? Probably but they’ve definitely lost points here. I mean c’mon. It’s like some fucking idiot standing in front of a stand of chairs surrounded by rope with a sign saying, “No late seating.”
You walk up, there’s not one seat with anyone in it. You ask the idiot: “Can I get a seat?”
Idiot: “Sorry, sir, the event started 30 minutes ago.”
You: “But, no one’s sitting in there.”
Idiot: “Sure, but you’re 30 minutes late. We don’t seat anyone after the event starts.”
You: “But, it’s not like I’m disturbing anyone…no one’s sitting there!”
Idiot: “Our policy states we don’t seat anyone after the event starts.”
You: “WTF?”
Idiot: “Sorry, sir, those are the rules.”
You: “How about if I give you some money…after all, who’s going to pay for the event?”
Idiot: “No thanks, if you’d like us to give you some money, please step over to the customer service booth.”
You: “Wait, you want to give me money that I’m happy to give you?”
Idiot: “Yes, we don’t need it. Our first priority is customer service.”
You: “I’m a customer.”
Idiot: “And we’d be happy to provide you with service at the booth.”
You: “You love your job, don’t you.”
Idiot: “Sorry, sir, I don’t have a stored response for that statement. Please go to the customer service booth.”
You could almost make a movie out of that…but then, who’d want to be on time for that piece of crap?
Moral of the story: Figure out what you’re here to do. If you really want to take care of your customers, stop gripping your policies like a security blanket and start paying attention to what you’re saying to your customers when they’re most unhappy…you might actually learn something.
out
Seems there’s another company (they breed like cockroaches) with patents on an idea that’s as basic to today’s world as breathing.
) recently and went through that wonderful ritual of trying to figure out what I forgot to back-up/copy before I had to start over (fuck you Microsoft and the registry your OS rode in on).